As I mentioned before in one of my recent posts, I’ve been disappointed about how long it’s taken me to bounce back from the chemo this time around. I really anticipated having a solid week of feeling good and filling up my days with fun activities. Earlier today was really the first day I felt pretty close to 100% since my second round of the juice. Don’t get me wrong - I am definitely grateful, better late than never, but it’s hard to not feel like Tuesday (my next chemo appointment) is right around the corner. I definitely don’t want to waste the next four days dwelling on the week ahead of me so I’m in the process of devising a plan. My oncologist and chemo nurse told me that the side effects would vary from week to week so although I don’t know exactly what to expect the next time around, I think it’s a pretty safe bet to assume that I won’t feel fantastic. So I am going to do some preparing this time around.
First I am going to concentrate on changing my outlook. I’m forcing myself to think of Tuesday differently. Instead of it being a dreadful day, I am going to try and be dare I say, excited about it. There ARE some positives. My friend Maggie is coming to the chemo appointment with me. This will definitely lighten the mood. There is a flat screen in the area where I receive treatment - between that, my kindle, lap top and the fact that we are both chatty Kathys, we will be thoroughly entertained for the 2 hour duration.
Another reason that I feel somewhat excited about my next appointment is the simple fact that it’s one more round under my belt! After this 3rd round I’ve only got one more and then I’m scheduled for a PET scan to assess my progress. Although the PET scan will be somewhat nerve-racking - it will mostly be exciting. There’s a possibility that I will only have to do two more months of chemo after that. I am preparing for the full 12 rounds, but hoping there’s a chance I’ll have to do 8. Either way it will be good to know how well the treatment is working.
Changing my perception on what Tuesday has in store for me is the first part of my plan to prepare for the week. The second part is literally to plan out what I am going to do during the week. I think that having movies and TV shows lined up for me to watch will be one good strategy. Last week I felt so lazy I didn’t even care what was on. I endured hours of Seinfeld and MTV reality shows (programs I would NEVER normally watch). It wasn’t enjoyable at all. If I actually have shows and movies that I’d enjoy watching ready to go then perhaps I won’t feel as miserable lying in bed feeling restless. I really have no excuse NOT to do this, I have netflix, amazon prime, regular cable, tons of movies and tons of downloaded TV shows already on my computer - so this is definitely something that needs to get done!
Another plan I have is to allow guests over. Last week I shyed away from the idea because I wasn’t feeling well. I felt like I would be terrible company. After talking with friends and family I realized that it’s pretty understandable if I’m not as talktative or lively when someone comes to visit and it’s a chemo week. In fact, most people would not even mind! I could still entertain, things just might have to be limited to a movie or something low key.
With that being said I feel a bit better about next week. Coming up with a plan and being proactive about things seems like a better idea than dwelling on it and giving it negative energy to feed off of. Perception really can be the determining factor of many things - including one’s general state. I prefer to be in a state of well-being so hopefully this thought out plan works out for me!